My Picky Eater

My son is a picky eater. He didn't start out that way, but by the time he turned three he was starting to exert his independence when it came to what he would or wouldn't eat. Thankfully there has always been a core group of healthy foods that he likes but I get bored serving him the same things over and over again. I'm also SO very thankful that he doesn't have any allergies that we have to work around.

In some ways he has improved over time and has learned to like a few new things, but he's still quite particular. In any case, I wanted to share some of the things that have worked for us when it comes to working with a picky eater.

The biggest thing to remember is that it does NOT work to force feed or turn this into a battle field. It's a battle you probably won't win. And who wants to make eating a stressful time? Not me. We've tried it in the past and it never seems to go well.

The second most important thing is to KEEP TRYING. Don't ever give up trying to introduce foods that they haven't liked in the past. Maybe making it in a different way will help them enjoy it. But always give them a chance to try things. They may surprise you and try it someday.

The times we have had success are when we don't make it a big deal that the kid doesn't like something. It's fine that they don't like something. I have food preferences too. Of course, these are children - and when they don't prefer 80% of all the foods your family eats, you need to try to expand their palette.

Here are a few tactics that have worked for us at one point or another:

• Put a bite or two of something new on their plate that the rest of the family is eating for a meal. Don't mention it's there, just proceed as thought nothing is awry. If they're feeling super picky they'll notice it right away and you have to try another tactic, but sometimes they'll just take a bite and realize they enjoy it. 
• When they do try a new food, the best way to promote additional excitement about eating more is to act completely surprised and shocked that they're eating said food. Throw in a little reverse psychology for good measure if you feel it suits. Things such as: "What?! I can't believe my eyes. Did you just eat that? No way!" or "I bet you're not going to want any more of that but I love it, so I'm going to eat yours." These often get them going and wanting to keep the shock factor going. It often helps them to eat more especially if they only sort of liked the new food and weren't sure they wanted to keep eating more. They'll sometimes keep going just to see you react with such amazement. 
• Have them try something new by putting their tongue on it. Sometimes they'll be more confident to try a bite if the first little bit on their tongue doesn't offend. 
• Have them try a bite and let them know it's okay to spit it out if they decide they really don't like it. 
• Bribe/Reward them. We offer our son a quarter to add to his piggy bank if he tries a new food. He doesn't really even spend his own money yet since he's only four, but he understands wanting to fill that piggy up with coins. You could also use foods that they already like or dessert at the end of the meal to encourage them to take a bite of something new.

Another problem with picky eaters is that you don't want to feel like you're catering to them when you eat meals together as a family. You want your child to be nourished and healthy but you can't fix everyone a different meal at dinnertime. Here's what we do:

I serve things I know my son likes and often let him choose (from healthy options) what he wants for breakfast and lunch. Then at dinner, I make what my husband and I like and let the kids eat the parts they like OR I sometimes will adapt the meal some to the kid's taste, but I try not veer far from the core menu. For example, when we eat fajitas for dinner I make cheese quesadillas for the kids. It goes with what we're eating and then they eat the rice and veggie that goes with our meal. Or when I make stir fry I keep aside some of the chicken and veggies that I cut up to steam separately since my son doesn't like the sauce. So he's eating mostly what we're eating, just in a little different format. Of course we continue to offer opportunities to try it with the sauce so that someday, we will all eat the same thing with no alternates needed.